Bullying at school

Prevention: How can we protect our child from hostility?

Targeted teasing, embarrassment, intimidation, ostracism: When their own child becomes a victim, parents are deeply concerned. But how can you as a parent make your child strong to prevent it from happening in the first place? How can bullying be prevented? And what's the best way to respond if it does happen to your child anyway? Find out here how bullying affects you and what solution strategies can help.

How does bullying work?

Bullying on the way to school, in the schoolyard, in all-day care or in the sports club is unfortunately not an exception. Causes can be a particular characteristic or personal weakness, but also physical appearance, origin, religion or skin color. Some children do not even know for what reasons they are being bullied. Often it hits those girls and boys who at first glance seem shy and more defenseless than others. When bullying and assault occur regularly and over a long period of time, it is called bullying.

The following forms of bullying can be distinguished:

With words: for example, nasty remarks, talking behind the back, insulting, insulting, spreading lies or rumors, assigning blame, blackmail
Mute bullying: for example, leave the child on the left, ignore, do not let them play or do not invite
With physical attacks:for example, tearing notebooks, scribbling on books, pushing, kicking, putting foot and other aggressive or hostile attacks

The reasons for bullying are complex. It usually starts harmlessly with small things and then increases. Classmates find a weakness or a sore spot where the victim is vulnerable and cannot defend himself. One hostile remark is followed by another and the others laugh along. Sometimes other children join in and mob.

How can I tell if my child is being bullied?

What specifically can we do if our child is being bullied?

Why does a child become a bullying victim?

The best protection against bullying is a healthy self-esteem

If your child is quickly intimidated, this will motivate the perpetrator to continue the nasty game. However, if your child reacts confidently and lets the insults bounce off him or her, the other children may soon stop enjoying it. It is therefore important that you give your child a healthy sense of self-esteem. This will make it possible for your daughter or son to confidently fend off personal attacks. If you have a trusting relationship, it will also be easier for your child to confide in you if something goes wrong at school, in a club or with friends. Then you can consider together which strategy will achieve the best success against bullying.

8 Tips: How to strengthen your child:

Consolidate self-confidence
Help your child develop healthy self-confidence by encouraging him or her from the beginning.
Respect boundaries
Give your child the opportunity to set their own boundaries and respect them.
Promote self-confidence
Encourage your child to speak up confidently during family discussions.
Stimulate friendships
Encourage friendships and social contacts in your child. A child who has friends is less likely to be attacked than a loner.
Enable a sense of achievement
Give your child a sense of achievement (for example, in sports, hobbies, family outings, etc.) by challenging him or her, but not overwhelming him or her.
Be a role model
Be a parental role model and resolve family conflicts constructively and without violence.
Have open conversations
Talk to your child about bullying and possible strategies for dealing with it.
Motivate and encourage
Encourage your child to get help if he or she or a friend is affected.

Where can we find help and support?

Competent telephone advice and assistance is available in North Rhine-Westphalia from the central MobbingLine NRW at telephone 0211 8371911. The service for those seeking help is free and anonymous if desired.
You can find a counseling center near you via the Counseling Center Finder of the DAJEB.
In NRW, there is a school psychological counseling center in every district and in every independent city, to which you can turn free of charge and independently. You can find a counseling center near you on the website of the school psychology NRW.
Many children and young people experience exclusion, bullying and hate speech on the net at school. It starts partly already in elementary school. The prevention program "We want mobbingfrei" enlightens students, parents and teachers what can be done against it. The anti-bullying program is scientifically supported by the Ludwig Maximilian University in Munich. More info can be found on the campaign page www.wirwollenmobbingfrei.com.