Avoid school stress

Causes for school stress are many: It can arise when a lot of material or difficult learning content must be learned in a short time and the workload becomes too great for your child. It also arises when a child feels overwhelmed by the learning material.

• Expectation pressure of parents
.

One of the biggest causes of stress is too much pressure to expect and perform, whether this is conscious or unconscious. Children are always looking for recognition and do not want to disappoint their parents. Worries about their own failure, bad grades or a pending (non-)promotion as well as their parents' reaction to this can trigger self-doubt and school anxiety. Even in elementary school, increasing pressure can be observed from grade to grade. At the latest in the third and fourth grade parents look at the grades with a view to the upcoming transfer to secondary school.

• Overachievement
.

Some children also feel overwhelmed by the school day: The routines are unfamiliar, the sitting still, the listening, the many rules that must be followed. Even the overstimulation by noise in the classroom can be a reason, if your child is particularly sensitive in this regard.

• Term stress
.

Trigger for school stress can also be a too full schedule, for example, if the afternoons are too tightly timed. Monday training in the sports club, Tuesday music lessons, Wednesday tutoring and Thursday an appointment with friends, before going to bed still cramming vocabulary or complete the recommended reading training: Then it simply lacks free time to play and relax.

• Bullying

More difficult and sometimes particularly serious in their consequences are problems with classmates. Quarrels and anger with other children or even lead to fear to go to school and actively participate in lessons there.

• Family problems
.

Sometimes family problems can also be the reason for school stress. In conflicts between parents or a separation, children often develop feelings of guilt, which can easily spread to other areas of life. Also, if a child has to bear a lot of responsibility at home, for example, in the care of a sibling, can lead to stress symptoms.

• Consequences of the Corona pandemic
.

An additional heavy burden has been created by the Corona pandemic. Not all students have coped well with homeschooling and alternate instruction. The missed curriculum now has to be made up when they return to school. This, too, is causing school stress for some children.

Perhaps your son complains about too much homework, is constantly fidgety and can't concentrate. Or your daughter seems frustrated and complains more and more often about headaches and stomach aches. Maybe your child doesn't like to talk about school at all, has trouble falling asleep, or is obviously withdrawing more and more, tired and listless. Every child reacts differently to school stress. The most common symptoms of stress include:

• Sleep disturbances and nightmares
.
• Headaches
• Nonspecific abdominal pain
• Concentration problems
• Sudden drop in performance
• Eating disorders (loss of appetite or overeating)
• Social withdrawal
• Rage and aggression
• Tiredness or listlessness
• Exam anxiety
.
• School anxiety
• Depression

If you observe one or more of the above behavior changes in your child: Find out what the reasons are and what triggers the school stress. Take the stress symptoms seriously and seek to talk with your child. Sentences like: "It'll be okay" or "You'll manage", do not help. Talk to your child in a relaxed atmosphere and give your daughter or son the feeling of being taken seriously. Ask about concerns and problems, let your child tell and listen carefully. Convey to your child that you will try together to defuse the situation through specific measures.